You've heard this said before...
You know it to be true.
Your soulmate is going to reflect back to you the things you most need to face. Not only that, they're the ones who need to deal with the SAME FREAKING FEARS as well!
so you don't fear it anymore.
so you face it!
so you can honestly get over IT and yourself and return to the TRUTH that it's safe to love. That everything is fine. That it was never really about you anyway.
When you return to TRUTH, to trusting and loving, you realize that the thing you were so scared of, the thing you ran from, well, it was never that big of a deal in the first place.
Case in point:
The other week, I was loudly & quite boldly confronted with one of my most long-standing fears.
Ever since I can remember, especially ever since my first boyfriend, I had this fear of being rejected--abandoned--not good enough. I remember the first boy I ever really liked and "dated." It was the summer before 7th grade. My family had just moved to a new school and I met this boy during the summer dance that, through a strange twist of events, I was invited to. This boy liked me right away. I honestly could not believe it. He was cute, popular, super nice. I was so amazed that not only did HE like me but that ANYONE did. I HAD JUST MOVED TO THIS TOWN!!! It was so fast.
Long story short. I ended up being super in my head about the whole thing. SUPER shy. When the summer ended and school began, I actually ignored him. I would see him in the cafeteria and just walk away (LOL this is SO EMBARRASSING to admit!!)! I did this not because I didn't like him but because I was SO SCARED he wasn't going to like me. I was scared that with school starting and him being with his friends, me being..with.. well... me trying to make friends, I was truly honestly scared that I wasn't good enough. I was trying to act indifferent. I was pushing away. I was withdrawing. I was scared.
Of course, that eventually led to us breaking up (our poor little 7th grade hearts lol). That was my first vivid memory of a relationship pattern that has since been repeated in my friendships and careers. The thought was always, "I'm going to withdraw before you get the chance to hurt me." "I'm going to leave you before you leave me." "I don't need you anyway."
Not being good enough.
The real fear was that my ego, my "heart," couldn't take being "rejected." What I would soon learn is that, actually, yes it can. And more importantly, it actually doesn't even matter. It doesn't matter if something doesn't work about because the TRUTH behind everything is, when things don't work out, it's not because you're not good enough, not worthy, etc. It's not a rejection. It's a life progression. When a relationship serves its purpose and comes to a natural conclusion, let it conclude! It didn't end because of some unworthiness BS story, it ended because it was always supposed to.
You can't move into what's waiting for you if you're still holding onto a past that is dead and gone.
Assuming that you are checking in with yourself, asking to know the TRUTH, and you are doing the Inner Work of returning to TRUTH, then... when a relationship has run its natural course despite all your best efforts, it's means it's time.
And you will know it.
You will feel it.
So how did this old pattern manifest for me the other week? How did I get the opportunity to look my silly little fear square in the eyes and say, "NOT TODAY SATAN!!" ;)
I'll tell you.
I started feeling my love withdrawing....or so I thought. I felt distance. This was all in contrast to the closeness that we usually have. As I started getting into fears of being rejected, I began to pull away too. What I DIDN'T know, though, was that as I was pulling away, I was triggering the same fear in him.
Fortunately, he was the more courageous one and decided to face the fears and talk about what was going on. It was a honest discussion that basically revealed that we were both running from the same fear! Our own fear. I was scared that I was losing him and he was scared that he was LOSING ME! We both were withdrawing to avoid the whole situation! We were in the process of creating a self-fulfilling prophecy had it not been for that moment of Truth.
And that's how it is with soulmates.
Your soulmate will reflect back YOUR SAME FEARS! Thank God we did a pattern interrupt. Instead of both us playing into the pattern of run and hide, we decided to face the very thing we were scared of and just..honestly... talk about it. Not only did discussing our fears eliminate the BS story we were telling ourselves, it brought us closer together.
And when you are dealing with a soulmate, you are going to be forced to face your own fears.
They are going to be facing it too.
It's going to take courage.
It's going to take a CONSCIOUS and DELIBERATE decision to change the pattern.
to be honest when you'd rather hide.
When you change the pattern in one relationship, you will change it in all your relationships. You will be allowing yourself to not only squash the BS fears but you will start creating REAL relationships, AMAZING relationships based on TRUTH and LOVE and acceptance and connection.
Which is what it's all about.
Face your fears to experience TRUE LOVE!
And if you want help with opening up, digging deep, and creating that kind of soulmate connection, join us in my newest program, 'Calling In Divine, Magnetic, Soulmate, Love.' This is the real work. The YOU work. Plus, its' the spiritual work that gets you magnetic to the relationship you most desire.
We have class TONIGHT! So join now! :)